Last week in my physical science class, a student with a contagious laugh asked, \u201cWould you write me a college recommendation letter?\u201d Her table-mates, three boys, broke up. She was serious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I chuckled too. For one, she\u2019s a sophomore. College application season comes fall, senior year. Ambitious juniors request letters in May, before summer break but they\u2019re the exceptions: the planners, forward thinkers, movers and shakers of the teenage set. A sophomore? You\u2019d think this girl\u2019s got rocket fuel in her veins.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alas, no – she\u2019s unproductive, off-task: giggling, laughing, goofing. Hardly the right stuff. It\u2019s what sophomores are best at, being silly, but this girl lives to stand in the comedic spotlight. She\u2019s the Sarah Silverman of the classroom, minus the off-color.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She got the boys roaring again when she said, \u201cWomen who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Life at 53 comes with its share of indignities. Surrounded by youth, the indignities get amplified. I\u2019ve slipped on a scientific supply catalog and dropped like a telephone book from a lab table, briefly disappearing from class view before popping up like nothing happened, supercharged with adrenaline, having concussed myself – left to wonder later why my temple pounded so. I\u2019ve reached above my head to hang a toy airplane from the foam ceiling panel when a muscle cramp set like concrete along my jawline so severe I had to walk, head askew, to the rear of the room and request the class, \u201cStop looking at me.\u201d After scarfing a cafeteria plate of rice and butter beans, I\u2019ve farted and stood silently, letting a nattily-attired boy take the fall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I approached her table, withholding comment, a teacher\u2019s first technique – physical proximity – to direct students back on task when Little Sarah Silverman, immune to discipline, dropped her pencil in dramatic fashion, \u201cI want to be a pediatrician, so I need a recommendation letter from a science teacher.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Between convulsive fits, the boy next to her, Deeter, said, \u201cCan you imagine taking your children to see Sarah?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Little Sarah Silverman said, \u201cI can\u2019t ask my biology teacher. Last year I had a concussion and I was forced to make-up my finals before I was ready.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd your story proves what?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Little Sarah changed the subject, \u201cI have another request.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOk.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWould you be offended if I told you a bald joke every day for the rest of the semester?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Research suggests that about half of all men will experience some kind of male pattern baldness by the time they are 50. It has been linked with things like poor self-esteem and body image, the perception of being old, and depression. It\u2019s hardly that surprising then that worldwide, men spend nearly $3.5 billion naturally trying to either hide or reverse their natural hair loss.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI don\u2019t get it,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou don\u2019t get bald jokes?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m not bald. A shaved head is my choice.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou look offended.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIrrelevance is not offensive.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAre you really that bald,\u201d little Sarah paused, a look thrown to her boys, \u201cor is your neck just blowing a bubble?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The boys exploded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Some students are not behaviorally built for the classroom. The unconventional recommendation letter, for me, is the easiest to write. The kids destined for stardom, you can just tell. The \u2018good student\u2019 model is hardly the only, or even an adequate, predictor for future success.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This past Friday the class had been quieter than normal; little Sarah Silverman was absent.\u00a0 End bell about to ring, Deeter presented his phone and I saw little Sarah\u2019s face, Face-timing.\u00a0 She appeared to be a passenger in a car.\u00a0 Her voice, filtered through the phone, \u201cI have a joke.\u00a0 Ready?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOk.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou\u2019re so bald, I can see what\u2019s on your mind.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In one study, researchers had participants rate photos of men with full heads of hair, and another group rate the same men, but with their hair digitally removed. Because only their hair was modified, any differences between the groups had to be due to baldness. The bald men were rated as being:<\/em><\/p>
<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n
- 13 percent more dominant.<\/em><\/li>
- 6 percent more confident.<\/em><\/li>
- 10 percent more masculine.<\/em><\/li>
- About an inch taller.<\/em><\/li>
- 13 percent stronger.<\/em><\/li>
- Nearly four years older.<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
Great news, still, four years older? Ouch. I could let my hair grow, perhaps regaining the lost four years, but at what cost? There\u2019s a third category of hair, the lowest rated: Thinning, But Not Bald<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ll be writing little Sarah Silverman her recommendation letter in eighteen months, if she still wants it. She\u2019s not my best student, but little Sarah reminds me, you\u2019re at your ambitious best with nothing to hide.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Last week in my physical science class, a student with a contagious laugh asked, \u201cWould you write me a college recommendation letter?\u201d Her table-mates, three boys, broke up. She was serious. I chuckled too. For one, she\u2019s a sophomore. College application season comes fall, senior year. Ambitious juniors request letters in May, before summer break […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-173","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/173","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=173"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/173\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":180,"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/173\/revisions\/180"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=173"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=173"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hojnotes.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=173"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}