November
30
QUIZ: Things Our Dog Eats or Things My Wife Claims Our Dog Eats
- head from the sugar plum fairy tree ornament
- toenail clippings
- turkey bones
- turkey meat
- deer bones
- deer poop
- celery
- body weight daily in baby carrots the pup cannot keep down which gets pinned on my roughhousing
- cotton stuffing from couch cushions
- twelve ounce can of pumpkin puree
- cotton stuffing from throw pillows
- her own poop at 2:00am our first night with her as 8-week-old pup
- feet from the sugar plum fairy tree ornament
- seasoned curly fries and fried pickles off the outdoor patio of Ye Olde Blind Dog Pub
- her own poop since that first night
- stick of butter, wrapper and all that I accidentally dropped (which we’ll never know if she could’ve kept down) and wondered for some time where the hell the wrapper went*
- other dogs’ poop
- decayed bird
- pine bark
- decayed frog
- toilet paper
- red berries from magnolia seed pod
- poisonous azalea flowers
- grass
- pages from Mary Trump’s tell-all
answers
odds: things my wife claims our dog eats
evens: things our dog eats
*necessitated a trip to the vet